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The beginning of a new year often offers an opportunity to set goals and embrace new beginnings. However, for those dealing with grief, traditional goal-setting might seem daunting or unattainable. Instead of concentrating on strict goals, consider adopting the gentle practice of setting intentions this year — a mindful approach to seeking guidance and comfort during challenging times.
The Power of Setting Intentions Over Goals
Goals are typically specific, measurable accomplishments, like "I will save $5,000 this year." While they can be motivating, they often carry pressure to achieve a specific result. Intentions, in contrast, are guiding principles for how you wish to live and feel. For instance, rather than focusing on saving a particular amount, you might say, "I will manage my finances with mindfulness and discipline." Intentions prioritize the process over perfection, allowing for flexibility and alignment with your personal journey.
For someone who lost her mother unexpectedly, setting strict goals like "keeping the house spotless" only increased stress. Instead, shifting to an intention like "I will create a welcoming space for myself and my family" provides a sense of purpose without the weight of expectation. This approach lets you honor your emotions while concentrating on small, achievable steps, such as keeping one room tidy or adding comforting decor.
Making Large Tasks Feel More Attainable
Grief often makes even the simplest tasks feel overwhelming. Setting an intention rather than a rigid goal can break down larger tasks into manageable steps while allowing for grace and flexibility. Rather than setting a goal like "I will complete all my paperwork this month," an intention such as "I will make progress on important tasks at a comfortable pace" removes the pressure and offers a gentler approach. Small, intentional actions, like organizing one folder at a time or making one important call, create momentum without adding stress.
This method acknowledges that grief is not linear; some days will feel more productive than others. By setting intentions, you give yourself permission to ride the waves of emotions, knowing that progress is still being made, no matter how small. As Anne Lamott wisely said, "Almost everything will work again if you unplug it for a few minutes, including you." Give yourself space to reset and approach tasks with self-compassion.
Aligning Intentions with Emotional Well-Being
Grief often changes our priorities, making intentions a more suitable approach. They emphasize mindset and values, providing comfort and clarity without the rigidity of traditional goals. Instead of "I will return to my pre-loss routine," an intention like "I will honor my needs and take life one step at a time" might feel more attainable. Intentions also align with emotional well-being, helping you stay present and connected to how you want to feel each day. Replace "Lose 10 pounds" with "Nourish my body with healthy food and gentle movement" to create space for growth, self-compassion, and healing.
The Role of Reflection in Navigating Grief
Reflection is a powerful tool for navigating grief. It helps you honor your emotions, celebrate small victories, and recognize areas where you’ve shown resilience. Ask yourself:
What brought moments of joy or peace this year?
What challenges taught me valuable lessons?
What do I want to carry forward into the new year?
Taking time to connect with your values can provide clarity. Consider what truly matters to you now — whether it’s connection, peace, creativity, or self-care — and focus on how you want to feel in 2025, such as calm, aligned, or hopeful. These reflections serve as a foundation for setting meaningful intentions that support healing.
Creating Intentions That Support Healing
When creating intentions, aim for clear, positive, and meaningful statements. Examples tailored for a grief journey might include:
"I intend to give myself grace and honor my emotions."
"I intend to find moments of joy amidst the sadness."
"I intend to prioritize rest and self-care."
Write these intentions in a place where you can revisit them often, like a journal or a note by your bedside, and let them guide your daily actions and choices.
Word of The Year: A Guiding Light
Another powerful practice is choosing a Word of the Year. This single word or phrase captures the essence of your intentions and values, serving as a guiding light throughout the year. To find your word, reflect on questions like:
What do I want more of in my life?
What do I need to let go of?
What theme feels most supportive for my healing journey?
Words like "Flow," "Balance," "Hope," "Strength," or "Peace" may resonate. Once chosen, your word can become a comforting companion. For example, if your word is "Flow," you might practice letting go of control in situations where it’s not needed and embrace adaptability.
For individuals experiencing grief from loss and a diminished sense of purpose, the term "Resilience" can be empowering. It can be placed on sticky notes, set as phone wallpaper, and serve as a reminder of strength whenever uncertainty arises.
Incorporating a chosen Word of the Year into daily life can enhance its influence. Consider designing a vision board with the word, jotting it down in a planner or journal, using it as a mantra during meditation, or setting phone reminders to contemplate it.
Giving Yourself Grace Through the Process
Remember, intentions and your Word of the Year are tools for growth, not rigid rules. They’re meant to evolve with you as you navigate the complexities of grief. Celebrate progress by acknowledging the courage it takes to reflect and set intentions. Stay connected by seeking out grief support groups, events, or communities that align with your intentions. Revisit your intentions and word often, perhaps through monthly reflection sessions.
As Deepak Chopra beautifully said, “An intention is the starting point of every dream.” Let your intentions guide you with kindness and compassion as you step into the new year.
What Are Your Intentions for 2025?
What intentions will you set for 2025? Share your thoughts in the comments, and let’s support each other on this journey of healing and growth.
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